They sell jeans pre-faded and ripped, so my new million-dollar fashion idea is pre-stained shirts. I’ve got many “designs” ready to go.
March 2011
53 posts
February 2011
37 posts
So, to review:
Superman is invulnerable except for Kryptonite.
And other Kryptonians.
And of course Yoko.
Dear Every Charity and Politician Ever:
Just because the law allows you to disregard the Do Not Call List doesn’t make it OK. If I’ve asked not to be called, I don’t want to be called, and will think less of any solicitor who does. I’ll remember your annoying calls when I’m writing checks and standing in the voting booth.
Sincerely,
Everyone on the Do Not Call List
Reblog or retweet if you agree!
Play
I hear Words With Friends is on Android now, so if you want to lose by 200, challenge me.
And don’t fret, Blackberry owners, you can join the fun too— Words With Friends will be on Blackberry by 2014.
“How do I know Hollywood doesn’t care any more? No one choreographs scenes where a hundred cop cars try to chase one guy at the same time. That’s how.”
—
do-over replied to your post: Going to the redemption center for the first time since I moved here.
What’s a redemption center? Is it a depot where one can procure redemption? Perhaps in bulk?
Yes.
(It’s where you recycle cans and bottles to get your five cents back, dork.)
If the Redemption Center doesn’t work, try the Catholic Church’s Confession app. It has the bishop’s imprimatur.
I love the new Blackberry commercial touting the Urban Spoon app. “Blackberry, now only 3 years behind the iPhone!”
“With all the lawnchairs out in the street to hold parking spots, it looks like Chicago is having a giant tailgating party.”
—
“What an amazing performance! If there’s a best actress in a herpes medicine commercial, that lady gets the Oscar.”
—
Trump “seriously considering run for president” because “who else could get the US through bankruptcy with its business reputation intact?”
Play
“The Catholic Church Confession iPhone app sounds great until you realize that Google will serve you ads based on your sins like in Gmail.”
—
Dibs
If I dig out a parking spot, it is mine. If you park in it, then under Chicago law I’m entitled to break your window and build a snowman in your driver’s seat.
Look, I don’t make the rules, but these are the things we must do to live in a civilized society.
- Me: Charles Woodson is out of his pads. That's not good.
- Matt: I don't even know who his backup is.
- Me: Well, you can bet it's not the defensive player of the year.
Halftime chat
- Me: I don't want to watch the Black Eyed Peas. Is something else on?
- Matt: Hmmm... Well, there's no Bud Bowl. And they didn't play the Lingerie Bowl this year.
- Me: No, they played the Lingerie Bowl last week. It's called the Pro Bowl now.
The NFL is paying to promote #superbowl on Twitter? Really?
They don’t think people will tweet about the Super Bowl or could figure that out themselves?
