In 2011 I resolve to stop making a big deal out of pointless non-events like when the clock or calendar changes.
January 2011
55 posts
December 2010
46 posts
HINT: If your answer is “I’m not a crazy cat woman. I have DOGS.” then you’re not winning the argument.
“There are three types of lies: lies, damned lies, and servings per container.”
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When Hugh Hefner proposed, his girlfriend burst into tears, saying “So it has come to this— a hundred year old perv proposes, and this is the best I can do.”
“Captain Von Trapp is so strict and disciplined that he’d probably make a great Nazi.”
—Yes, I am live-tweeting The Sound Of Music, and so is @thetcat.
“Bears win, so nothing left to do now but sit back and watch The Sound Of Music.”
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Totally Real Conversation We Heard
- Person: Once he came in 2nd in a chili cookoff.
- Stupid Person: Oh, really. What did he make?
- Person: ...
- Stupid Person: ?
- Person: Chili. He made chili.
I hope no one in Chicago got an iPhone today, because I’m tired of sharing what little 3G AT&T has here.
Oh, and merry Christmas!
Who needs Santa when their wife is making cookies?
“According to the local news there are people out shopping today. Though to be fair, I’m making it sound more interesting than they did.”
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OK, so is there a way to backup Tumblr posts to a file?
“I don’t mean to brag, but I’m so old I can remember when blankets didn’t have sleeves.”
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“It’s hard text-flirting with my wife when my phone keeps on changing RAWR to East.”
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Me.
(I hope my wife doesn’t get in the car and head out towards Long Island.)
I want notifications
What happened to Tumblr notifications? It was the only way to see if someone liked an older post. Get me your supervisor on the phone.
I feel bad for that one Army Ranger who watches Bravo who now has been asked a thousand times if he’s gay. It STILL doesn’t matter.
“CAUTIONARY TALE: If DeNiro gets hit by a car tomorrow, his obituary will start “Robert DeNiro, who died while promoting Fockers 3…”
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Also I’d like to point out that the iPhone autocorrect failed to recognize “hipster” or “doofus”. Who do they think are buying iPhones?
I’m more convinced than ever that the only difference between a crazy homeless person talking to themselves on the street and a hipster doofus is Bluetooth.
And sometimes I can’t see the Bluetooth.
Dark Gray vs. Light Gray
I ordered a custom hoodie whose gray options were “light gray” and “dark gray” and I ordered it in “dark gray” and I got it in an “athletic gray” when I was expecting more of a “charcoal gray” and I don’t know whether I can send it back and this is seriously what I obsess over these days.
Well, boo hoo hoo, young lady. When I was your age, we didn’t have color— take a look at the TV shows and movies from the time, you’ll see— so our whole lives were deciding shades of gray.
How do you back-up/download your tweets?
I used to use Tweetake but it never works any more. Anyone have any suggestions?
