January 2012
13 posts
Jeez, there’s more clapping at the State of the Union than at the start of Colbert. Did Congress install an applause sign?
2 tags
Acceptable reasons for murder in Chicago:
1. Self-defense.
2. Intruder in your house.
3. Ignored your dibs on parking space YOU DUG OUT.
Santorum won Iowa by 69 votes. →
But given the definition of Santorum, wouldn’t it be more appropriate if he won by 66. Think about it.
“Rick Perry says he’s leaving the race: “It’s exhausting...”
– @TeaPartyCat (formerly @theTCAT)
Jay-Z says reports of him dropping the use of... →
Sadly, everything but the quote is true.
2 tags
“Never mind. I’ll just look it up in this set of encyclopedias I found at a...”
Jay-Z announced he’s not going to say “bitch” anymore. I wonder what would’ve happened if he had a son?
“When Jordan had the ball in the closing seconds of the fourth quarter—clock...”
– Interesting post from my friends over at Chicago Side Sports, a new sports site that’s trying to take a different angle on sports reporting. Take a look: ChicagoSide: Michael Jordan Is A Jerk.
“Both Chicago airports are closed right now because the pilots are all out making...”
Chicagoans, it's going to snow tomorrow →
And my friend over at City Hall created this site to cover all the city’s snow services and rules.
December 2011
15 posts
“The nativity scene is not for battle.”
– My sister, to her boys 9 and 6
“There are no atheists in foxholes. Neither are there grinches when the Christmas...”
“Thanks to sans-serif fonts, I’m only just learning that he was not Kim...”
“Friends, if anyone asks you where I was this weekend, whatever you do,...”
“Crap! The new Lexus I bought for my wife got stuck under a viaduct because of...”
2 tags
“Putting Windows on my MacBook. It’s a process I call Harrison...”
“I don’t have Seasonal Affected Disorder; I have Bears Suck Affected...”
Rick Santorum says he'll make a major announcement... →
Sources say he’ll be changing his name to “Dan Savage” to fix his Google problem.
Chicagoans: I’m going to meet @dansinker (the man behind @MayorEmanuel) on Saturday at Third Coast Comics in Rogers Park. You should too.
“Is 14 years too many for Blagojevich? No. I’d rather he be sentenced until...”
“BREAKING: Millions make spelling jokes on Twitter in wake of Dan Quayle...”
“I’m a little concerned that if Newt Gingrich becomes president that he...”
November 2011
24 posts
“All I Really Need to Know I Learned From Twitter Trending Topics”
Rick Perry couldn't remember the voting age, but... →
Herman Cain reportedly considering dropping out of... →
1 tag
“Feeling sick today. Might be coming down with Bears-itis. WebMD says symptoms...”
“Pardoning turkeys is cute, but the numbers show a very high recidivism rate....”
“Rick Perry called Obama soft on crime and promised that when he is president...”
“It’s a strange time when I read the headline “police drag protesters...”
– summersumz
1 tag
Herman Cain says he doesn't need to read up on...
Herman Cain denied his lack of policy knowledge (or preparation) should keep him from being a great president. He answers his critics by saying
“We need a leader, not a reader.”*
And then added
In these troubled times
all policies should be rhymes.
America will be fine
once Herman Cain implements 9-9-9.
No, 9-9-9 isn’t crazy,
it’s that poor people are lazy.
The Tea Party...
Rick Perry challenges Nancy Pelosi to a debate. Is... →
So many questions:
More debates from Perry? Has he forgotten what happened in all the previous debates?
Is Nancy Pelosi running in the Republican primary?
Is Perry thinking about running for congress?
Does he think Pelosi is still the Speaker?
If he’s going to debate a Democrat, wouldn’t challenging Obama make more sense?
Has he sobered up?
“Stop nagging, Adobe Updater! This is why the iPhone broke up with you.”
“New York State law says I can’t text while I drive. It says nothing about being...”
– thatchicmichelle
“I’m not sure what the Stop Online Piracy Act is about, so I downloaded it...”
Is anyone else disturbed that Jerry Sandusky's... →
Read them both. Disturbing:
Bashir interview with Jackson
Costas interview with Sandusky
“I would rather see the Aldermen walk around with sandwich boards than more...”
– My friend Jason, in response to the billboards going up on Chicago River bridgehouses.
New poll shows: →
Newt Gingrich leading.
12% of Republicans still support Rick Perry, though not surprisingly they couldn’t give 3 reasons why.
“For every one person that comes forward with a false accusation, there are...”
– Herman Cain
As defenses go, this is ridiculous. It’s like if Jeffrey Dahmer tried to claim innocence by saying “For every person they say I murdered and ate, there are thousands I didn’t kill.” It doesn’t matter that he didn’t harass every woman he ever met.
“Sarah Palin called Rick Perry to commiserate about how unfair debates are,...”
“I’m so hungry! Remind me never to get stuck behind Rick Perry when...”
“Kim Kardashian volunteered to host the Oscars but dropped out when she realized...”